The Shared Problem-solving (No Blame) Approach to handling bullying is suitable for stopping bullying behaviour. Specific acts of violence should be dealt with in accordance with the law. This is an enabling approach to bullying. It starts with the understanding that it is more important to solve the problem of bullying than to punish the perpetrator. This process should be run by the Guidance Counsellor, Health Co-ordinator, or other trained people. It is important that the process is properly managed, so that bullying is not reinforced.

1 Interview the person being bullied

• Support them and congratulate them on telling.

• Assure them that the bullying is not their fault and they do not deserve to be bullied.

• Discuss how it feels to be bullied.

• Invite them to write down their feelings about being bullied.

• Explore any possible behaviours of their own where they may act more decisively to increase their own confidence in the situation.

• Tell them you are going to work with other people involved and some others in the group/class to get them to understand the effect that bullying or lack of support is having on one of their classmates.

• Ask them for names of people they would like included in the group.

2 Assemble a group of people

• Ask the advice of teachers who know the class or peer group well and can remain objective.

• Include the person who has been doing the bullying and his/her two main supporters.

• Include one or two bystanders who have been friends of the victim in the past.

• Include two dominant, assertive group/class members who in the past have observed the bullying but done nothing to stop the bullying.

3 Convene a meeting of the group

• Do not include the victim.

• Allow at least 30 minutes.

• Seat everyone in a circle.

• Explain the problem and share the feelings the victim has written down.

• Discuss why the victim is feeling this way.

• Don't apportion blame. This will allow the group to respond objectively to the bullying and to help find a solution.

• Talk about group responsibility for helping solve this problem.

• Encourage each group member to suggest positive ways the victim could be made happier.

• Say you will leave it up to the group to do these things to support the victim.

• Set a time for reconvening in a week (or other appropriate time lapse), to review progress.

4 Continue to support the victim yourself

• Meet with the victim informally once a day.

• Ensure the ongoing safety of the victim.

5 Re-convene the group in a week

• Discuss progress on doing the things they agreed to do.

• Praise them for any changes you have noticed.